Cucumber Eyes

For the last 15 minutes I have been sat with cucumber slices on my eyes in a hope to reduce the puffy redness of them. It seems a side effect of this last chemo is to make my eyes to stream constantly so I appear to be in a continuous fit of tears, so much so my eyes are beginning to get a little sore, hence trying the cucumber. And it was lovely for those 15 minutes until the cucumber warmed up and I opened my eyes and the tears started again. However I suppose this is a small price to pay for all the toxic drugs in my body doing their job of kicking cancers bum.

Last blog I was going to attempt courgette cake in an attempt to use up some of the mammoth courgettes from the garden (both of which only use up one courgette so not really helping use up the hundreds we are getting!). I have now tried 2 different courgette cakes, both a success! The courgette cupcakes went down well with everybody who tried them, quite similar to a carrot cake. And the second one, which I preferred I think was a courgette and sultana loaf. This was a perfect fruit loaf and reminded me of the one my nana used to make for me, my brother and cousins. There would always be one of these in her kitchen. I attempted to replicate her fruit loaf a few months ago and was told by my granddad it wasn’t as good! I am going to keep trying until I get his seal of approval!

Last week I had my biggest disaster in the kitchen ever! I attempted to make macaroons….  I wanted to make them for my friend Lowri, as part of her birthday present as she is a big fan of them. I have never made them before, however I was expecting them to be perfect. To look like the ones you buy in the shops, pretty colours, sandwiched together with icing and just overall delightful (see picture below). I read how complicated they are and how it takes people many attempts to get them right. O no not me I thought. I will get them right first time! O how wrong was I?! My macaroons looked like mini fried eggs. Flat as a pancake. I did however realise my error and mistakes are made to be learnt from! I had read how they can stick very easily to trays and baking paper and that nothing was more upsetting than the perfect macaroons being stuck on the tray, so being the baking genius I am (obviously not), I thought I would grease the baking paper to be extra sure they did not stick. O no no no no! Very basic error when working with egg whites is to put fat anywhere near them. Hence my disastrous fried egg/pancake looking macaroons, which turns out is pretty upsetting too (well at least I think this is what went wrong!). Needless to say Lowri did not get macaroons for her birthday, just a lovely little vintage cake stand, with no cakes on. Maybe I will have perfected them in time for her next birthday.

 

I also have some very exciting tomato news! There I was minding my own business doing the dishes (which look out onto the tomatoes), when what do I see, a hint of red??? It could not be. Out I go to investigate further and behold, an orange tomato! Result! It has only taken since May I think for the tomatoes to turn red! I hope other follow suit soon and begin the transition from green to red! I have been very excited about my tomatoes since I planted them as my dad has always grown amazing tomatoes, and they taste so different to the shop ones and have that smell about them (if you grow your own tomatoes you will know the smell I mean). And of course, when going back to mum and dads this weekend just gone, I was greeted by his lovely tomato plants, lots of them orange and ready to eat, and there were mine, back in Cardiff being stubborn and staying green. But now I have an orange one! I have also had a chilli, which I ate last night with my dinner (not very spicy though) and have more growing!

 

So all is well on the garden front at the moment. My sunflowers are still going strong, apart from being covered by the giant courgette plants so I am cutting them and bringing them inside to enjoy. We have had an invasion of caterpillars on the broccoli, there are so many of them I don’t want to eat it in fear of accidently eating one (I probably already have) as they hide in all the nooks of the broccoli. Luckily the broccoli is pretty much finished so it was not all destroyed! They just better not get to my sprouting broccoli or I’ll be out to get them!

What do you think about a Courgette Cake?

I’ve been off the blogging scene for a while now. I think I just needed a little break from it after my solid effort of 3 blogs! Still need to take a leaf out of my cousin’s blogging skills! However in my absence my vegetables have bloomed and blossomed and are doing amazingly well.

My sunflower success rate however has not done so well and I have one (maybe 1 and a half depending on whether said sunflower will recover) out of 24. Oops. This sunflower is, I think, the beast of all sunflowers. It is not a giant kiddies one (I was too cheapskate to buy that packet of seeds, well seed, £1.99 for one giant sunflower seed!), but is a huge plant sized, garden centre worthy, award winning Chelsea Flower Show sunflower! This I am very proud of!

Now we have courgettes, broccoli, and particularly mangetouts coming out of our ears! I do not mind as I love all these vegetables.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

However to use up some courgettes there is a recipe in one of my favourite cake books, The Hummingbird Bakery, for Courgette, Walnut and Cinnamon cake. I reckon this may be quite nice. Courgettes don’t have much flavour and you have to grate it in. Like Carrot Cake, a favourite of many, and yet you can’t taste the carrot. So I think this cake will be next on my To Bake list. I just need to find people willing to try it. Any takers?

My last cake went down a storm, a lovely Strawberry and Poppyseed cake, perfect for the lovely weather we have been having and very nice if I do say so myself. Although the real test is to see if James likes it as he is not a massive cake fan so when he does like my baking I am very chuffed, and he has yet to try it. If he doesn’t by tonight it will be gone and in my tummy! Oh well – ego boost or satisfied tummy?

 

There’s an update on my baking and my broccoli, how are my boobs you may ask? Well I am 5 chemos down, awaiting round 5 side effects, due tomorrow, and hopefully no repeat of hospital visit brought on by chemo 4. Very irritating seeing as my temperature lasted half an hour, and me and James were in hospital on one of the sunniest days of the year, also the day we were supposed to be meeting our gorgeous new nephew for the first time and visiting our other gorgeous nephew and his lovely parents (who are big fans of my baking skills!). To put the icing on the cake it was also Wimbledon final day, and for anyone who has been in hospitals before know that when you are lucky enough to have a TV in your room, it is not your averaged sized TV. It is about the size of an old school Playboy (I did love the Nintendo Playboy, you can’t beat SuperMario 1 and 2!). So trying to see where the tennis ball was being hit, whether it was in or out, was nearby impossible. Luckily the kind doctor sent me off end of Set 1, with the biggest antibiotics I have ever seen. Seriously. Even broken in half they were still above average tablet size and not the nice coated, easy to swallow type either! However I was happy to get home and witness the wonderful Andy Murray win his first Wimbledon title. I may have had a little nap in Set 2 but was wide awake for the third and final intense set! So 5 chemos down and 1 to go. Woop woooo! And to top it off Rick Stein will be waiting for me and James after the Final Chemo 6. Well I don’t know if he will personally be waiting, a girl can hope (big fan of Rick Stein’s Indian Odyssey by the way ‘that’s a mind blasting curry Ricky!’), but his cookery course will!

Red or Green curry?

Today I am writing from the patio, catching a few rays of sunshine in between all the cooking I am doing. I have been rather busy this last week, recovering from the icky chemo which went almost without a hitch. Let me explain.... I got a blister on my hand from doing some (a lot) of gardening on the Sunday before my treatment. It was like one of the ones you get on your heel from a new pair of shoes. It hurts but nobody makes a song or dance of it. Well, except if you are having chemo. I went in to have my bloods done the day before and nurse saw my hand. You would have thought it was some huge, disgusting, puss filled, required emergency surgery, injury. Anyway she told me to keep it clean which I was anyway otherwise would have had the wrath from James! He is the biggest keep cuts clean freak ever! Travelling with him was rather hilarious as our whole supply of alcohol wipes was depleted from his one cut in the first week (well worth it though as it did not get infected)! So that was that; until the next day when I had to produce my arm for the chemo needle. New nurse made the same fuss, except I did get told off as well for getting said cut. It’s not like I did it on purpose and yes I did have my gardening gloves on (white with flowers). So that I did find rather amusing. Never will I accidently get a blister again. For any nurses reading my cut is fully healed, was kept nice and dry and frequently plastered with sudocrem.

I was also able to recover quickly after a few grotty days due to my birthday celebrations which consisted of a very nice family barbeque on Saturday, and a lovely roast and visit from my parents on Sunday. All cooked by James and all delicious. James makes the best roast potatoes in the world. This is a fact.

This afternoon I am busy cooking. My best friend George and her fiancé James are visiting this weekend. As it is supposed to be sunny tomorrow George is venturing further into deep dark Wales then she has ever been as we are hoping to go to the beach (previous visits have only got us as far as Cardiff shops). On the menu is ginger and chocolate cupcakes, supposedly for tomorrow but depending on Georges’ hunger on arrival it could be a pre dinner snack (this happened on last visit). Dinner will be a Thai feast! Spring rolls (said in a Thai accent), green papaya salad, morning glory and red curry, followed by pineapple and coconut soufflé. Yum yum yum! Anyone who knows me knows about my love for Thai food. When I told James I was doing a Thai feast he said I bet you do red or green curry. This is because whenever I cook Thai I do just cook red or green curry. I can’t help it; I love red and green curry. I would eat it every day if I could. When me and James first moved into Cardiff a couple of years ago (and on my visits down prior to moving) every time we went for dinner it would be to The Thai House. We ate there so much we had to have a little break from it. Well James did, I didn’t as like I said I could eat it every day, and still took the chance to go with my friends. However, we also discovered The Potted Pig in this time which meant we had 2 favourite restaurants to decide between when we wanted to go out.

So soon I will begin the preparation for tonight’s feast. Cupcakes are half done and smell delicious and I got to play with my new Kitchen aid.  If anyone would like to come and do the dishes for me you can have one. A cupcake, not a kitchen aid. James will not be home to pester me in the kitchen and tell me I am doing things wrong (or not the way he would do it) because he cannot stand how messy I am in the kitchen so is taking himself of to the gym after work. We are rather hilarious when we try and cook together as neither wants to be sous chef and both think we know best so it can get quite heated! This will be amusing when we go to Rick Stein's Asian seafood class in September (my birthday present, very excited), as it says on the website you work in pairs. Even James' mum suggested we do no work together that day! I do hope Rick is there though. I love him! Though I would get very starstruck and probably cut a finger off.... This is highly likely as I go slightly crazy around famous people. 

Back to today - when James gets back I plan to be well on top of things and the kitchen to be nice and tidy with all dishes used so far washed up. And not to be using every pan in the kitchen (another one of my traits). However unless someone does come and help me with all the mess I am about to create, this is more than likely not going to be the case!

Brrr my head's a bit chilly!

So Saturday was the day of the big shave… My hair had started to give up the ghost, not helped by the fact that I am a constant hair fiddler. When I was at school, me and my best friend George always used to always check the back of each other jumpers for hairs after lunch, who knows how or why this began! While I was looking in the mirror at the vast amount of hair on my top one evening this came flooding back and I had a little chuckle to myself as she would have enjoyed that mammoth task!

Anyway so Saturday morning arrived, James was armed with his clippers and for once was not worried about the mess I was about to make, swiped away my suggestion of newspaper on the floor. It took about 5 minutes to let him near my head as I was overcome with the giggles. I don’t know how men go through having their heads shaved, it really tickles! And then all of a sudden my hair was gone. Well it did actually take a while, and I think James was pretty pleased with his barber efforts. A lot of people asked me when I said I was going to shave my head which hairdresser I was going to and were a bit shocked when I said James was doing it. Even the wig man! My thoughts were he couldn’t exactly do it wrong, and he is probably the only one I would have trusted to do it (well I would have trusted my mum too, but she wouldn’t have been able to do it and most probably would have cried throughout!). 

 

So the result was not as bad as expected although I was pretty horrified with how brown and dark my hair looked. I was not happy about that! So the deed was done and we raised and continue to raise an amazing amount of money for the Breast Centre, so thank you all for that.

As we had a day of summer we went down the beach, me in a coat and Ugg boots (it’s always a bit chillier by the beach and I don't like being cold), and my wig. After a little walk we went to the arcade and tried to win some Nemo teddies for our nephew on one of those grabber games (Nemo or Dory as we won Squirt last time). We didn’t win. I think it’s rigged as every time James got close and found Dory, and I got excited and started jumping up and down, the claw dropped her. Very disappointed.

Once we got home I took my wig off and blimey my head noticed the difference. Brain freeze! So for the last few days I’ve been alternating between my wig, head scarves and bare head. I think the scarves make me look more poorly at the moment, I suppose partly it’s because I just associate them with cancer. I don’t actually mind having a naked head but do not want people staring at me when I go out (and it’s very cold without hair) so have yet to brave that!

I have of course done some baking over the weekend, and had a very green fingered Sunday which I finished off today by repotting my chillies (hopefully spicy ones for my love of spicy food) and planted some cherry tomatoes. This all needed to be done prior to chemo cycle 2 tomorrow as the next few days will most probably be spent with me laying on the sofa doing my jigsaw, what a geek I have become….

To Blog or Not To Blog?

Writing things down is a way to get things off your chest, to get your thoughts and feelings out there without actually having to say them out loud. It seems these days it’s the thing to do, especially if you’ve got some time on your hands, as I do at the moment.

On Valentine’s day this year I was diagnosed with breast cancer. Instead of going out for a nice meal with my boyfriend (something we usually do after Valentine’s Day so we don’t get charged ridiculous prices for dishes we can’t even chose ourselves) we were sat at home with the task of telling our families. The hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. After only a few hours of being diagnosed I couldn’t really bring myself to say the word ‘cancer.’ At 25 years old it wasn’t on my list of things to do, on my rough plan on how I wanted my life to turn out but it is now something that I have to deal with every day, as does my family.

A few people suggested I write a blog or keep a diary, which I was unsure of at first. Why would I want people, some of them strangers, knowing personal things about me and about what I am going through? My mind starting to change when James (my wonderful boyfriend and solid rock through this awful ordeal) encouraged me to set up a justgiving page to raise money by shaving my head for the Breast Centre Llandough, where I was treated and will continue to be treated. I wanted to raise a couple of hundred pounds, just as a thank you to my Breast nurse, my doctor, and all the other people at the Breast Centre Llandough. A special mention to the singing receptionist (the Grease melody I think it was) for managing to give me and James a laugh on one of our visits, something not common in that place! Little did I know what an amazing response this page would receive. Currently the total raised is over £1500. Friends, family, friends of family, friends of friends and even some strangers have donated generously and completely overwhelmed me with messages of support and encouragement.

And so I think this blog will be born. It will not be all doom, gloom and cancer however as that is not the kind of person I am and I definitely do not want this thing taking over my life, nor will I let it. I will keep you updated on my day to day adventures - I seem to have taken up gardening. I am an expert gardener; this is what I believe anyway.

Ask my parents and James and you may receive a different response. Also ask James’ dad Graham, at the end of the summer how his vegetable patch has got on as he is allowing me to plant a few things! So far I have a few little broccoli plants popping up to say hello and some sunflowers that seemed to have stopped growing….. I also have increased my baking repertoire, something I have loved doing for years; however sugary dairy filled goods are not highly recommended with cancer, so I bake, have a little treat of what I have made and leave the rest for others to eat.

So I will endeavour to keep you updated on my ever increasing gardening skills, my interesting concoctions in the kitchen, as well as how I am doing.